


Beep

by Jezunya



Series: The Pepperony100 Challenge [11]
Category: Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: #85 - Busy, F/M, Originally Posted on LiveJournal, Past Tense, Pepper Potts is a saint, Phone wars, Tony Stark is a brat, pepperony100 challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-30
Updated: 2014-03-30
Packaged: 2018-01-17 12:16:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1387291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jezunya/pseuds/Jezunya
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony had changed the message on his phone from her sensible, business-like statement to… something else. Again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Beep

When the voicemail picked up, Pepper let out a sigh, about to hang up. But that’s when she heard it: Tony had changed the message on his phone from her sensible, business-like statement to… something else. Again.

_“Thank you for calling Iron Man Industries, home of the Iron Man. And by that, we don’t just mean the armor—”_

She hit the ‘End’ button with a little more force than was necessary, and dialed the special line.

“Ms. Potts,” the soft British voice greeted her.

“Where is he?”

Jarvis paused for only a second. “Western Siberia, ma’am. Would you like longitude and latitude?”

“No,” Pepper sighed, rubbing the bridge of her nose with her thumb and forefinger. “Thank you, Jarvis.”

“Shall I inform Mr. Stark that you wished to speak with him?”

“No. I’ll take care of this. Thank you,” she said again. Iron Man business was becoming more and more of a legitimate excuse to miss meetings and appointments, even those that had been scheduled and rescheduled out the wazoo – even board of directors meetings.

“Of course, Ms. Potts.”

She hung up.

 

* * *

 

Tony failed to answer his phone. Again.

And by ‘failed to answer’ she really meant ‘dodged her call like the scared little ninny boy he was.’

The voicemail picked up, and Pepper ground her teeth together, waiting for it to be done with so that she could really let him have it.

_“You’ve reached Tony Stark, CEO of Stark Industries and Avenger Operative ‘Iron Man.’ If this call is business related, please contact Mr. Stark’s assistant, Pepper Potts, at…”_

Or that’s what the voicemail was _supposed_ to say. She’d even gotten Jarvis to record it so that people who called (the incredibly stupid, anal, small-minded people to whom she would also love to give a piece of her mind right now) wouldn’t be caught off guard by her female voice answering his phone.

Instead, the voicemail, still in Jarvis’ voice she noted, said this:

_“You’ve reached Tony Stark, CEO of Stark Industries, Avenger Operative ‘Iron Man,’ and sexiest man currently walking the earth. If your call is regarding the latest development in the on-going story of the zoo, the falcon, and the porn star, Mr. Stark cordially invites you to go f—”_

Pepper groaned, drowning out the rest of the message, and when the customary beep sounded, she literally snarled into the phone. “You. Dead.”

Her hang ups were becoming rather violent.

 

* * *

 

_“Iron Man is currently indisposed, no doubt doing something far more important and significant than what you are calling about or what you will ever do with your little life. But feel free to leave a message anyway.”_

Pepper rolled her eyes and sighed, feeling slightly sorry for Jarvis. She left her message and decided she’d get Tony for that one later.

 

* * *

 

Tony recorded it himself this time.

And had apparently been reading Dr. Seuss.

_“If you’ve called for a date, I’m afraid you’re too late. Unless your name is Potts, ‘cause for you I’ve got the—”_

She hung up.

 

* * *

 

She caught him re-recording his cell phone’s voicemail when she brought him a cup of coffee in his workshop. She snatched the phone right out of his hands and walked back upstairs without saying a word.

 

* * *

 

Seventeen new messages. All business calls, except for the fourteen from Tony’s house phone.

_“I do actually need my cell phone back, Potts. You know, for work? And stuff?”_

_“How about if I promise not to change the message more than once a week?”_

_“I’ll record whatever you tell me to record? Please?”_

_“Pepperrrrr…”_

 

* * *

 

Jarvis sent her the alert she’d requested via text message when Tony began changing his voicemail greeting again.

She blinked and looked down at the video phone (re-confiscated for bad behavior) sitting on the desk next to her laptop. Frowning, she called his number, eyes narrowing when the phone on the desk didn’t react but the line continued to ring in her ear.

Tony answered after a moment. “Potts!” She could hear the smile in his voice.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m—” He grunted. “You know. The good fight and all that.”

It took her a moment to process that. “Oh my god. Tony, are you changing your voicemail from inside the suit?”

“Well, yeah, tech—”

“In the middle of a _battle?!_ ”

“‘Battle’ is really a strong word, Pepper…”

“Tony…”

“It’s a couple of guys, a couple bazookas. No big.”

“Bazookas?! Tony!”

“You should call back, listen to the voicemail,” he said, grinning again. “You’ll like this one.”

A small part of her wanted to tell him that if the bazookas didn’t kill him, she would, but the rest of her was still too frightened by the idea of him being in combat at all to do anything but worry. She hung up.

 

* * *

 

He didn’t answer his phone again that night. She didn’t know why she called back, but she hoped his silence was because he was being responsible and concentrating on the fight, and not… Well, not for any other reason.

She hung up every time before the voicemail got started.

 

* * *

 

There was a new message on her phone when she woke up the next morning. She wondered at the fact that she hadn’t woken to hear the call.

 _“Pepper. Tony. I’m sorry about last night with the suit. I know that freaks you out. I’ll be good from now on, I promise.”_ There was a pause. _“I’m home now, and fine, by the way. Not a scratch. Seriously, the paint’s not even chipped. Just so you don’t worry. I’ll see you tomorrow.”_

Relief washed through her and Pepper smiled despite herself, her fingers already calling his phone. She wasn't surprised when he didn’t answer. Easy mission or not, he was always dead tired when he got back; she could see him in her mind, sprawled on the couch in his workshop, or in the living room if he’d at least attempted the climb to his bedroom, completely dead to the world for at least the next couple of hours.

When his voicemail picked up, she lay back against her pillows, letting herself laugh along and simply enjoying the sound of his voice.

**Author's Note:**

> Come find me [on tumblr](http://jezunya.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
